Teaching kids about Holidays

We just finished the Fourth of July celebration at our house, and my five year old was told all about the parade and carnival, and fireworks to follow that evening. As we walked to the parade, he asked me why there were flags on a lot of the lawns. I realized that I didn’t teach him about what the holiday meant.

It doesn’t matter what the holiday is, or what your beliefs are. If we don’t teach our children what the holidays really mean, they are going to get a different idea than what we want. Often we get so caught up in preparing for the holidays that we don’t spend the time that we should in teaching our children what the holiday means.

Before the holiday, take a half hour to spend teaching about the holiday. Give a brief overview of what the holiday is about, and find an activity that you can do with your children to reinforce their understanding. If you are teaching about Halloween, you can talk about the holiday before you carve pumpkins.

We celebrate Christ’s resurrection for Easter. One year I wanted to teach my children more about what Easter is really about. I found a recipe on the internet that makes a hollow cookie. Each ingredient symbolized something to do with the Easter holiday and Christ’s resurrection. My kids and I made the cookies and then put them in the oven overnight. When we woke up the next morning, the cookies were done, and they were hollow inside, representing an empty tomb.

Whether you have a religious belief or just celebrate the commercial beliefs about holidays, there are meanings behind each holiday. Before we get caught up in the holiday itself, make sure your children understand that it is more than getting together with family, or dressing up in costumes.

The Independent Child

When my youngest child was just over one year old, I took him to run errands with a friend. As I was leaving the house, I put my son down and helped him walk down the stairs. As my friend watched from her car, she hollered out, “What are you doing, trying to make him grow up too fast?” I have thought about that a lot as I watch my son learn to do things for himself. I don’t want him to grow up too fast but I want him to learn and develop.

Creating an independent child has a lot more to do with the parent than with the child. As a parent, we have to be able to let go and allow our children to try and fail. Sometimes this is too difficult for a parent, who will step in and assist. Unfortunately, our human nature often requires that we fail at something before we can learn how to succeed. When a mother or father steps in for the child, they are taking away that learning opportunity.

Start out small. Teach your child something simple that they can try for themselves. Even children just learning to walk can be taught to do things for themselves. Give them a box to put toys in. Little kids love to put things in boxes. Show them how to clean up their toys, and give them a big smile and lots of praise when they do it. Two year olds can learn to make their beds. Resist the urge to go fix the bedspread when they are done. Let them do it themselves, and tell them how great they are when they do it.

Creating independence is a lot about letting go of our own fears and having faith in our children. It’s an important part of growing up, and one we shouldn’t deny our children of learning.

Protecting your Kids on the Internet

We hear of online predators all the time. You hear about things you can do to protect your children. Have you done them? We have two children that use the internet every day. Below are some of the rules we use that can help you make sure the internet is a safe place for your own children.

Make sure an adult approves adding an email address. Don’t allow your kids to send emails to people they don’t know, or subscribe to emails on websites. This can send junk mail to your children’s email box. Junk mail can contain information you do not want your children reading, as well as links to websites.

Keep the computer in a visible place in your house. If your children are surfing in private, you don’t know what they are viewing. It’s so easy to find bad stuff on the internet. Make sure you can see what your kids are visiting.

Go in after your child has gone to bed and check the internet history to see what websites they have visited. If you feel like they have been sending inappropriate emails, you can check their email also. You can see what they have sent and what they have deleted.

Provide a list of favorites for the websites they are allowed to visit. If they have heard about a new website, check it out first to make sure it is kid friendly. Don’t allow them to search through Google or another search engine. Making sure they stick to the approved list increases the odds that their internet viewing will be safe.

Following a few suggestions can help ensure that your children are safe when online. Our children live in a different world from the one we grew up in. Make sure they are safe.

Teaching Kids about Money

My younger sister can’t save money for anything. If she gets $20, she goes out and gets her nails done, without any idea how she will pay for the upkeep. Watching her made me realize that I needed to teach my children about money.

Give your children an allowance that is age appropriate. For our kids, they get half of their age in allowance. So, on their birthday, they always get a 50 cent raise. We provide chores during the summer and expect them to help out when needed during the school year. Set some rules for earning the allowance and an amount for your children.

Now that they are earning some money, teach them about saving it. Many banks have savings accounts for children. Help them decide how much money they want to have to spend and how much to put away. Make them a chart that keeps track of their money so they can watch it grow.

Let them spend some of it and be silly. Part of the fun of having money is spending it. I had a friend who would not allow their child to spend any of his money. He had over $100 in the bank but couldn’t use it. Letting your kids spend their money teaches them the value of things and how to use money wisely. Make sure your kids only spend what they have. Don’t loan money against the allowance they will receive. Our boss doesn’t give a paycheck advance, kids need to learn this too.

Teaching your kids about money will provide them a valuable tool for when they are older and get their first job. Make spending and saving money a success for them.

Getting a Pet for your Child

I’ve never met a child that hasn’t wanted a pet of some type. There are many different pets you can chose for your child, depending on their age and what you would like in your home.

Hermit crabs are an easy pet to begin with. They aren’t messy, require little care, and still give your child a pet of their own that they can care for. You can take them out of their cage and let them crawl around, and they can change to larger shells as they grow.

Hamsters or guinea pigs require a little more care. Their cage must be cleaned every week, and they need fresh food and water every day. They can be messy, and they are a nocturnal animal, which means they want to play while you are sleeping. If you put a hamster wheel in their cage, they will get their exercise at night, which can be noisy.

Cats and dogs are less messy to care for, but require more care in other ways. Dogs need regular baths and combing. Both need food and water several times a day. Dogs need to be walked and taught to be house trained. If you decide to give your child a dog as a pet, be prepared to assist in the training, puppies are a lot of work.

There are several other types of pets you can choose. Reptiles might be a good option if you want a pet with low maintenance. Fish are a great pet to begin with, although they tend to die easily.

Giving your child a pet is a great way to teach them responsibility. Make sure you choose a pet that is appropriate for your child’s age.

Making new Friends

There are times when your child will need to learn how to make new friends. These times include when they starting school or changing to a new school, if you move, or if people have moved into your neighborhood. This can be scary for some kids. Here are some ways to help your child make new friends.

Give them something to do with the new friend. Asking another child to play in the sprinklers is less intimidating than just asking them to play. Your child will not have to worry about thinking of something to do when the friend comes over.

Find instances when your child can talk to other children. When you go to the park, help your child say hi and be friendly to other kids. This will help them get over the shyness that can come when talking to someone they don’t know.

Make friends with the parents of new neighbors, and invite them and their children over. This can be less stressful for your kids and give them the confidence they need. You are close by, and they can watch you make new friends as well. Your example can teach them.

Start out by having cousins come play if possible. If your child hasn’t played with a lot of children, this can be an easy way to learn the social skills to get along with others. Family members are easier because you already know them, and they are less forgiving if your child decides to bite their child.

Helping your child learn to make new friends is a great way to give them the confidence they need in school and throughout life. Using these tips and others can help make finding new friends easier.

Healthy Eating for Kids

Chicken nuggets and macaroni and cheese seem to be the mainstream diet for many children. Parents often struggle to get their children to eat healthy foods. Our family started on a new diet. We switched our white bread for wheat and started stocking the fridge with fruits and vegetables. The kids rebelled for a while, but now they are used to it. They fight for the last strawberry. Here are some suggestions to help you make the transition to healthy eating in your home.

Monitor how many snacks your children eat in a day. The rule at our house is a snack at 10:00 a.m. and 3:00 p.m. I don’t have whiny kids wanting treats all day, because they know when they can have them. However, if they want something healthy like an apple, a bagel, or some fruit, they can have it without asking.

Add more vegetables to the dinner table. Try a variety of vegetables, and keep trying them even when your kids say they don’t like them. Taste buds change over time. Have them try one bite each time you serve something they don’t like.

Make food more fun. Serving dinner that your kids can adapt to their own tastes makes dinner more fun, and gets them to eat better. Try taco soup with a base to include tomatoes and pinto beans and let them add their own ingredients: cheese, sour cream, chips, olives, corn, etc. They probably won’t notice that there were tomatoes in there.

Healthy eating takes time but is worth it in the end. Your kids will adjust and eventually won’t miss the candy and chips that they used to munch on. And everyone will benefit from the change.

Disciplining for each Child

There are many books with varying opinions on how you should discipline your children. However, I believe that the person that knows your child best is you. Articles and books can give advice, but it is important to understand your child and what will work for them.

Not all children are the same, and this applies to children in the same family. Using time out for one child may not work for another. It’s important to understand this and not try to force the same discipline on a child that it won’t work for.

A friend of mine has a child who defies all the rules of discipline and parenting. He had a problem biting and she asked me for advice. I told her every method I have ever heard of to stop a child from biting, and she had tried them all. She had to take the time to understand him and find out what works for him.

Disciplining children is important. They need to understand that there are rules, and when they break the rules, there are consequences. However, understandably, the discipline should not use force that could be harmful to the child. When properly disciplined, a child will learn tools that will help them throughout their lives.

The discipline should also relate to the act. If a child colors all over a wall, they should have to clean up the mess. If they are too small, give them some time to try alone and then help them. Make sure it isn’t a game to them, they need to understand that they are in trouble.

Understanding your child and finding out what discipline works for them will help them become well adjusted as they get older, and help your household to run smoother.

Crafting with Kids

Most children love to do craft projects, and this can be a fun way to teach them new things. There are endless possibilities to how you can do this. Begin gathering supplies that they can use when they would like to. Here are a few suggestions.

Start collecting objects that can be reused. Small baby food containers, empty toilet rolls, twist ties from bread bags, small cardboard boxes, and old birthday cards are some ideas. Put them in a box with some markers, glue, scissors, and heavy cardstock and let your child’s imagination flow.

Teach them about volcanoes and then make a volcano from clay or playdough. You can make a playdough that you can dry, or simply reuse when finished. Or get some paint and paper and create a volcano through painting. Volcanoes are just one idea; you could use any subject to teach through crafts.

Scrapbooking is a fun activity with kids and can be really simple. Find some items that they can add to a scrapbook, like the confetti from their birthday party, the cards they received, and a balloon. Use these objects to decorate the scrapbook page and include the pictures from their party. Show them how to journal to help them record their thoughts from that event.

Make a craft box with different types of crafts they can use. Include paper, markers, crayons, paints, glues, tape, wood sticks, and other items. Back to school sales are a great time to stock up on some of these supplies.

Allowing your kids to create with crafts gives them an outlet for the creativity that we want to bloom inside. Make sure you marvel at their creation, and they will love you for it.

Teaching about the Internet

Kids today have a different perception of the computer and the internet. Children in elementary school are being taught how to use a computer. Some school reports require internet sources. Teaching your children about the internet and setting some rules will help keep them safer.

First, help your children understand that seeing something on the internet doesn’t make it real. Friends that they meet might not really be children. Help them to understand how the internet makes everyone anonymous. Anyone can create a web site and make their information appear as fact.

Help them set up an email account that you can control. Limit the emails they send out, make sure they are to friends that they know. Set up an email filter so that unwanted email isn’t viewable to them. Decide on rules regarding registering for things on web sites, you may not want them doing this.

Set a limit on computer time. Experts advise that children have no more than two hours of television, electronic games, or computer use in a day. Monitor their time on the computer to try to keep within these guidelines.

Show them how to search for things they are looking for. There are several great search engines for kids. Some popular search engines that cater to children include www.yahooligans.com and www.ajkids.com. If you allow them to search for information through a search engine, monitor their web browsing to make sure they don’t end up where you don’t want them.

The internet can be a great tool for children, and provided a wealth of information, games, and other fun activities. Monitor their computer time, and watch where they are surfing. Always make sure that your kids are following safety rules when on the internet.

Getting a Child to Clean their Room

I have had a lot of experience with getting a child to clean their room. Each child is different and what works with one will not work with another. Some children don’t need help in this area, this article is written for the ones that do. Rewards and punishments work for some children, but not for others. Some children look at a messy room and have no idea how to begin cleaning it. For kids that are just completely overwhelmed, here are some ideas for helping them.

Break down the job into different areas. For example, have your child pick up all the books in the room. When that is done, have them put all the clothes in a pile. Breaking down the mess into small messes helps make the job more manageable.

Make a game out of cleaning. Set a time limit for different items and see what they can clean up the fastest. Write down the times and find out which items was the easiest to clean.

Pull everything together in one big pile. Have your child pick out the biggest item from the pile and put that away first. Or find everything that is the color red and put that away. Sometimes just cleaning up in a different way is all it takes to get the job done.

Setting rewards and punishments can work sometimes, but helping your child learn how to manage the mess and get it cleaned timely is the key to success every time. Teaching them how to clean their room saves you from harassing them every day to get it cleaned. And it can give your child a great sense of accomplishment once they are done.

Chores with Children

We decided to start chores with our kids, and give them an allowance to go with it. When we started, we had a set amount they earned each week, but we would take 50 cents away each time they didn’t do a job. One daughter decided that she would determine whether she did the job based on how much she lost if she didn’t complete it. She would also ask for more money if we asked her to do anything else. So we changed our system.

Assigning chores with children is a great way to teach them the value of work and belonging to a family. In the summer when school is out, we give our children an allowance with the chores and a chore chart with specific jobs each day. During the school year, we take away the chore chart and the allowance, but they are still required to help out around the house when asked. We explain that helping out with the house is part of being a family.

Other families handle chores in different ways. Each family is different, and the children in the family are different as well. It is important to find a system that works with you and your kids, and is easy to manage. No one wants to spend all day harassing their kids to get their work done. And in the real work, a boss wouldn’t do this either, they would lose their job.

Starting chores is a good way to prepare your children for life. It gives them a sense of purpose and accomplishment, shows the importance of working together as a family, and teaches them that work can be rewarding. Kids are never too young to start with age appropriate jobs.

Choosing good Friends

Friends are an important part of childhood and you want to make sure that your child develops good friendships early on. It’s easiest to make the best choices for your children while they are young.

Have your children invite their friends to play at your house. This gives you a chance to see how they play together and how they interact with other members of your family. Become acquainted with their parents also, and you will find that this will help you understand their family situation. Help your child to understand what your values are and to recognize the same values in friends that they make.

Teach your kids values that are important to you, like being honest, and make sure they understand that it applies to friends too. I had a daughter who came to me because a friend wanted her to lie to me about going to the mall. She told me what she really wanted to do, and what her friend thought she should say. After her friend went home that day, we talked about what makes a good friend. She decided that she didn’t want a friend that was going to try to get her to lie.

Realize that all children are different. You might have a child that has fifteen friends and makes new friends easily. Then you might have another child who only has one or two friends, but has a closer friendship with them. Recognize what works for your child and help them develop the relationships that fit with their own personality.

Helping your child understand how to be a good friend will help them recognize good friends also. It is so much easier to influence your children while they are young. Take advantage of these opportunities while you can.

Camping with Kids

I remember the days of camping before children. Grab a bag of clothes, sleeping bag and tent, and make a quick stop at the store for some food. My friends and I could plan a camping trip in fifteen minutes and be out the door a half hour later. Camping with kids is a whole different ballgame.

Most of the friends I know that camp with their kids have a trailer to sleep in. They have found that this is the easiest route to take. Turning on a generator to run your blow dryer is not my idea of camping. So how can you “rough it” with kids?

This is another great teaching opportunity. Survival. Necessity. Make a list of what you must take to survive your camping trip. Talk to your kids about what is a necessary item. Have them pack these first. Then talk about what they would like to make camping more fun or easier. See if there is room to pack some of these things.

Know that food is half the battle. Figure out how you are going to cook your food, and plan accordingly. You don’t want to spend all day cooking, and you don’t want to be sitting around the fire at 8:00 at night waiting for that chicken to cook.

Don’t get caught up in “what are we going to do”. You are out in nature! Explore it. Go for walks, find a place to camp by a river or lake, watch the stars, dig in the dirt. Show your children that entertainment can be found in the simple things.

Keeping it simple will make your camping trip more fun and less work for you. With a little pre-planning, you can have a great time camping with your kids.

Starting an Allowance

It’s never too early to start teaching your children about money. A great way to begin this is by giving them an allowance. There are several ways to do this, and I’ll talk about a few of them.

You can give allowance based on chores with specific money amounts. For example, you can decide to pay fifty cents for setting the dinner table, $1.00 for keeping their bedroom clean all week. You decide the chores you would like your child to do, and then show them how to do the work correctly. Let them know ahead of time how much they get for each job, and keep track. Decide how often they will receive the money they have earned.

Another option is to have a set amount of allowance based on their age. My children earn half their age in allowance. My five year old gets $2.50 a week. In order to earn their allowance, they have to keep their room clean, do an assigned job each day, and help out with other things that we might need. When they don’t do jobs or keep their room clean, they lose part of their allowance for the week.

Some parents give their children money without requiring the child to earn it. I don’t like this option because I like giving a value to the money. When children have to earn it, it means more to them. However, if you don’t like the idea of putting your kids to work, you can still teach them about money. I would still suggest assigning a requirement to the money, such as good grades or good behavior.

Whatever option you chose, starting an allowance with your children will teach them about working, how to spend money, and how to save it as well.

Teaching Responsibility

It is so important to teach your kids responsibility, but many parents fail in this area. I watch parents that will not allow their children to do anything because they don’t want to deal with the mess, they feel their child will fail, or they don’t want to take the time. Yet, a responsible child needs these skills to be successful in school and to build a strong sense of self.

There are many things you can do to teach your child responsibility. This is an important part of parenting. We will briefly discuss a few ideas.

Give your child chores or things around the house that they must do. Start a small child out by having them make their bed and put their toys away. Give older children jobs that must be done every day, or every week. Giving them work to do around the house helps them belong more to the family and the home.

Find a pet that your child would like and help them learn to care for it. This teaches them to be responsible for another living thing. There are many different choices in pets and many pet stores will help you make that decision.

Make your child be responsible for the consequences of their actions. Allow them to make choices for themselves. Understanding that there are rewards and punishments for their actions helps to develop social skills they need.

As our children grow, we can continue to provide opportunities where our children can learn and develop. Teaching responsibility now will help them make correct choices later in life. This is such an important skill to learn, and one that is easy to teach if we take the time.

How to Survive a Road Trip

Traveling by car with children can be a lot of fun, or a lot of frustration. Proper planning can make all the difference. Here are some tips to make your travel time a success.

Print out a map showing the beginning and ending points, with larger cities marked. As you drive, have your kids mark off the cities or other landmarks on the map. This helps them see how far they have gone, how much farther you have to go, and teaches them about time and distance. It’s also great to squash the “how much longer” questions.

Bring along games and books that they can play on their own, but also have some games you can play as a family. One of our favorites is to pick a topic, and then we rotate through the family. If we say “ice cream”, then each person tells of a story or something they remember that involves ice cream. This is a great way to learn more about your children, as well as tell them some new stories.

No road trip would be complete without snacks. Make a bag for each child with their own snacks inside. They can pick and choose what they would like, giving them some freedom and giving you a break. Let them know beforehand that the treats must last through the whole trip so they won’t eat them all at once. It’s also fun to have some other treats stashed away that you can pull out when the kids are restless.

A DVD player can be an easy way to entertain the kids while you are driving, but finding some family games and activities can help you bond with your children more and make the trip a better memory. If you have a DVD player in your car, don’t rely on it for all the entertainment. Using the tips discussed here can make your trip easier, and bring you closer as a family.

Safety in the Home

When we bring a new baby home, most families prepare their house for the new arrival. As the child grows, safety measures are put into place, like locking cabinets and installing outlet covers. However, many families don’t think about household safety as their kids get older. Here are some things to think about.

Do you have an emergency plan in place for your children? Do they know where to go if you have to get out of the house quickly? Plan a location that is away from your house that can be a meeting place for all family members. Make sure your children understand the circumstances in which they would leave the house and wait at your meeting place.

Do your children know what to do if there is a fire in your house? Most parents figure that their children know to get out, but is it something that you have ever practiced? You only have a few minutes when the fire breaks out before all the oxygen is gone from the air and you need to have everyone out before then. Practice escape routes with your children.

If there is an emergency in the home, do your kids know who to call? Do they know how to dial 9-1-1? Can they tell their address to the operator on the phone? It is a good idea to have emergency information posted above the phone in your house. Write down the emergency numbers, and your address. Even adults have forgotten their address in a crisis.

When you have an emergency, it is too late to plan. Make sure that you and your children have a plan in place to protect your family in an emergency. Don’t wait until it’s too late.

Back to School Shopping

If you are like me, back to school shopping can be hassle. By the end of the day, you are tired and grumpy. Here’s a way to make the shopping a little easier, and teach your children some valuable lessons.

Before you begin shopping, get out all the Fall clothes and go through them with your children. You can make this fun by having a fashion show. Let your children model their favorite outfits. Find out what fits, what is worn out, and what can be used for the new school year. Make a list of what your child has, and what they need. If you have pants without a matching shirt, make a note of specific colors that you need. Don’t forget underclothes and socks as well as any accessories like belts.

Try to take as few children with you as possible. This is a great time to invest in a babysitter if you have little kids that aren’t in school yet. Nothing makes shopping a drag like a whiny, tired child.

Start your shopping trip by going out to breakfast or lunch. Besides giving your kids an extra treat, it will give you the energy to make it through the day.

Give your children a budget amount to shoot for. Allow them to make the choice of buying the jeans that they really love but are expensive, or getting two other kinds of pants and a shirt for the same price. This is a great opportunity to teach them about money and how to get the best deal.

No matter how many children you are buying for, using these tips can make back to school less of a chore. You might find that shopping for your kids can be fun.

Getting along with Siblings

If you have more than one child, chances are they fight with one another. Sibling rivalry is a part of growing up and being in a family. I have a great way of dealing with this, and it could be termed as Passive Parenting.

This is how Passive Parenting works. First, set some ground rules for tattletaling. For our kids, you can come tell a parent if someone is hurting you, if they are hurt themselves, or if someone is being destructive, like coloring on the walls. If they tattletale for something else, they get into trouble themselves.

Now, when your child comes and complains about something a sibling is doing, listen to them, and then say something like, “I’ll bet you hate that.” “That isn’t very fun.” “That really bites.” Make it a statement that you can use for any situation. Don’t offer suggestions to fix it, just offer your statement. If they repeat the problem, repeat your answer. It will likely frustrate them at first, but they will learn to solve their own problems.

This doesn’t work for every situation, but it works for many of them. For other problems, have your children set some rules that will help them deal with other problems that come up. For my kids, they like the privacy of their bedrooms, and hate when brothers or sisters get into their things. So, my kids have set a rule that you have to ask permission to go into a sibling’s bedroom.

Sibling rivalry is something that never goes away, but if you teach your children to handle their own battles, you are creating a more confident child and one that will get along better with others.